The NEW NORM
Chapter thirty
THE NEW NORM doesn’t jump to conclusions
I’m usually a guy who waits to hear all the facts, especially when it involves the law, before passing judgment. However, almost nine years ago, I heard about a complaint filed with the B.C. Human Rights tribunal from a customer of a Vancouver restaurant who was heckled by a comedian during a comedy night. With the slightest of information from the news, I thought, “If you start heckling at a comedy club, you can’t complain.”
You see, I took the word of the comedian, Guy Earle. He said three lesbians were sitting in front, necking, and when he commented, they started heckling him back. He admits to lashing back and it went downhill from there. From that perspective, no one feels sorry for people who go to a comedy show, bring unwanted attention on themselves and then get called on it. Right?
And then in April, 2011, I was surprised to discover that one of the women referred to, Lorna Pardy, won about $23,000 for the violation of her rights. When you add in all the costs, the comedian was ordered to pay more than $15,000 and the owner of the restaurant more than $7,500.
According to the news, Earle referred to the human rights proceedings as a “kangaroo court” and the owner of the restaurant, Salam Ismail, explained how he immigrated to Canada from an oppressive country to flee this kind of persecution.
But as usual, when I read the eighty-four-page decision of this “kangaroo court,” which involved witnesses being cross-examined under oath, this is what I found. Pardy, her girlfriend and another friend were sitting outside the Zesty restaurant when they were called inside by the staff as per the neighbourhood regulations. The women didn’t know it was comedy night, but the staff sat them in a booth near the stage.
Guy Earle
Some discussion with the wait staff caught Earle’s attention and he noticed Pardy kiss her girlfriend, but according to testimony, it was a simple and normal kiss. While the three women didn’t say anything to Earle, he said, "Don't mind that inconsiderate (expletive deleted) table over there. You know lesbians are always ruining it for everybody. Do you have a strap-on? You can take your girlfriend home and (expletive deleted). Are you on the rag? Is that why you're being such a (expletives deleted)? Stupid (expletive deleted). Stupid (expletive deleted).”
Then Earle left the stage angrily, walking quickly toward the women at their booth. Pardy threw a glass of water in Earle’s face, saying, “Don’t come near our table.” Earle got back on stage to introduce another comic, with the crowd booing.
He said, "Thanks for ruining the evening, (expletive deleted). You're a fat ugly (expletive deleted). No man will (expletive deleted) you; that's why you're a (expletive deleted), you fat (expletive deleted). Do you want to be a man? Is that why you're such a (expletive deleted). Somebody shut her up. Put a (expletive deleted) in her mouth and shut her the (expletive deleted) up."
When the show ended, Earle went back to their table and Pardy threw a second glass of water in his face. Distraught, she went to the washroom, and on the way back, she tried to avoid Earle, but he stood over her and a verbal exchange took place with both pointing fingers at one another.
He said: "You had to ruin the show, you (expletive deleted) stupid (expletive deleted), stupid (expletive deleted)." You want to be a man, don't you?" Earle then grabbed her sunglasses, broke them in two and threw them on the floor.
The human rights adjudicator accepted the negative psychological impact this humiliating public rant had on Pardy and it got even worse when a YouTube video showed Earle being interviewed where he tried to put a positive spin on the events in the restaurant. Unfortunately for Earle, on the video he also admitted to some of the vulgar comments he made.
The owner of the restaurant might have been surprised that he was on the hook for part of the financial award, but I doubt he came to Canada to allow women to be verbally abused in his establishment. Two years later, the B.C. Supreme Court upheld the ruling.
It was a lesson for me not to jump to conclusions until I know all the facts.
It’s very clear Mr. Earle could have learned a lot if had taken my Respectful Workplace online course. There are plenty of changes taking place to prevent harassment, discrimination and bullying at work and this was clearly way, way over the line.
The OLD NORM
- listens to one side of a story and decides based on that one side.
- may hear another side, but has made up his mind already, so it’s tough to overturn the initial decision or judgment.
- lets her stereotypes get in the way of the actual facts of a situation.
- doesn’t balance the rights of everyone involved; hence, makes quick and rash decisions that can lead to more problems.
The NEW NORM
- listens to one side of a story and tries hard not to be swayed.
- ensures he listens to all sides of a story (knowing there are always at least two sides to any story).
- takes into consideration the rights of everyone involved, thereby avoiding complaints or legal action when a decision is one-sided.
- isn’t swayed by sensational talk shows or videos.
Suggestions for the New Norm:
01
Get all the facts. If someone feels very passionately about an injustice they believe has happened to them, it’s hard not to get swept up in the story being told. After all, why would a person lie? You can tell an employee that you will take his complaint or problem very seriously, but don’t come to any conclusions until you have all the facts.
02
You don’t have to be a detective. Or a lawyer, for that matter. Getting all the facts might just mean asking a few key questions. The term “natural justice” is really about fairness, and most of us don’t have to have formal training to know when something feels right or wrong. If it’s straightforward and you think you’ve covered all the bases, then you should feel comfortable making an informed decision.
03
Bring in the pros when needed. Despite the above suggestions, there are times you don’t feel confident enough to conduct a proper “investigation.” It could be you’re too close to the people involved, you realize it’s more complex, or there’s a requirement for an outsider. Know when to ask for help internally or even externally.
This chapter lets you know not to jump to conclusions when you hear about some “loopy” human rights decision. We need to get all the facts before jumping to conclusions and determining if there has been harassment, bullying and discrimination at work.
For another example of inappropriate workplace behaviour, consider reading
Chapter 13: The New Norm doesn’t engage in “baffling and bizarre” workplace behaviour.
Purchase a copy of The New Norm, or if you think all your supervisors and managers, could learn many valuable lessons about creating a respectful workplace, free of harassment, bullying and discrimination, you can get volume discounts.
What one reader has to say about Stephen’s book, The New Norm
“Stephen’s book is a brilliant reminder of workplace situations that are disturbing, yet slip by unaddressed by so many in both the private and public sector. When these behaviours are unaddressed, they become the norm because we allow them to be.
Just like his first book, Stephen is insightful, his writing is moving and he inspires his readers to take immediate action to disapprove of, and address harassment and other inappropriate behaviour every time we see it, feel it and hear about it. In a concise format, he gives us a series of snapshots of old vs. new, acceptable vs. unacceptable, right vs. wrong, in a way that is understandable.
If workplace leaders take just some of Stephen’s practical advice, they will go a long way to rid their workplace of unacceptable behaviours such as harassment, discrimination and bullying. It’s clear that to create Stephen’s “New Norm,” we need to ACT NOW! We can’t wait any longer.”
Tatjana Zatezalo
Manager, Organizational Development, Halifax Regional Municipality
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Stephen Hammond is a lawyer turned speaker and consultant in the field of harassment, sexual harassment, bullying and discrimination at work.
The New Norm is Stephen’s third book.
Here’s more information about Stephen.
